Shuffle Challenge: DGrayMan
by aurla0
Summary: 10 songs with 10 drabbles. Written for a challenge. Rules inside. WARNING: May contain mentions or hints of yaoi. Some dark themes.


**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN -Man!**

Shuffle Challenge: -Man

**Rules:  
>1. Pick a character, fandom, pairing, friendship, whatever.<br>2. Put iTunes or your music program on shuffle and start playing songs.  
>3. For each song, write something inspired by the song related to the theme you chose earlier. You only have the song length. No pre-planning and no writing after the song is over. No skipping songs either.<br>4. Do this for ten songs**

Character: Allen Walker

Theme: Loneliness

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><p><strong>1. Time of Dying by Three Days Grace<strong>

**Heartbeat**

He was alone again. The Noah had left him here, left him to bleed out and die.

But he wouldn't! He wouldn't give those glinting golden eyes the satisfaction, wouldn't become just a slight source of amusement to that monster!

He gasped, choking on his own blood. His arm... his left arm was gone. It had been torn off. But he would still survive.

He was Allen Walker, and be would be strong... even when all had abandoned him.

He would hold on to hope.

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><p><strong>2. River Below by Billy Talent<strong>

**Replay Repentance**

Time replayed itself over and over again, none noticing except for him.

This was his repentance, his consequence for failing them all. This was the result of touching Miranda's Innocence after she had died.

But why... why this time was that Noah bastard looking at him like that?

He had to ignore it and move on. He had a purpose, and he could not get distracted.

This was his repentance, and he deserved it.

* * *

><p><strong>3. February Air by Lights<strong>

**Cold Survival**

It was cold.

A lone boy wandered the empty streets.

Why was he never accepted? Why was he always shunned? Why did he have to be the freak, with the monstrous arm.

He was kicked out yet again, but he couldn't stop, he had to keep walking.

He had to survive, because Mana would have wanted him to. He had to survive... If only because Mana would have wanted him to.

He pulled into himself, shivering in the freezing air.

He was so... cold.

* * *

><p><strong>4. Rainbow Veins by Owl City<strong>

**Hopeful**

Why was it like this? Why was Tyki Mikk trying to make him happy?

Why couldn't he leave Allen alone? He couldn't be happy, he had to repent for failing them. He couldn't be happy, he wasn't good enough. He wasn't strong enough.

But Tyki said those things... could they be true? Why then, hadn't anyone else said them? How could he believe his enemy? But yet...

Was it fair? Was this fair, to give in, to leave his burden behind selfishly?

He didn't know.

But... he was tired of loneliness.

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><p><strong>5. I Want To Destroy Something Beautiful by Josh Woodward<strong>

**Broken Angel**

Would you tear the wings off a butterfly just to see it suffer? Would you clip the wings of a bird to keep it with you always? Would you destroy another's happiness for the sake of your own?

Tyki would, and he did, and he wondered if it really mattered.

Because Allen couldn't object, wouldn't object, never did object. And he had never had that much self-control.

He tore apart an angel for his own pleasure, pinned its bloodstained wings to the wall, and then kept it with him always, all because he felt like it.

* * *

><p><strong>6. Haunted by Evanescence<strong>

**Left Behind**

A ghost of the past, left behind, never to move on.

Why had he not been saved? He had tried, he had been faithful, he had fought for them all. Why, then, was he still here?

Why did he have to watch families, friends, lovers together, while he was alone?

...He must truly be a monster.

* * *

><p><strong>7. Wonder by Natalie Merchant<strong>

**Nothing**

So many doctors, reporters came to him, wanting to hear his story.

His 'home' was always full of people, asking him questions, telling him their truths.

Why then... did he feel so alone?

Why was he born this way? Why could he not have been normal? With friends, family... He wanted those things that he had never had. He didn't want money, he didn't want expensive gifts.

Why could he never get what he wanted?

Why did he have everything except what he really yearned for?

Why? Why was he alone?

* * *

><p><strong>8. Animal I Have Become by Three Days Grace<strong>

**Shattered Mind**

A nightmarish prison within his own mind, forced to watch and listen as all he cared for was destroyed.

The fourteenth had not even been the problem.

Had he truly been so unstable? So dangerous to everyone around him, including himself?

He had an answer to why he could not remember his life on the streets at last.

Now he just didn't want to know.

He cried silently, locked inside his own mind, alone.

It was his fault. He could not save them from himself.

* * *

><p><strong>9. The Middle by Jimmy Eat World<strong>

**Wish**

He wasn't good enough, he wasn't strong enough, and he was alone again.

It kept happening. Why did he keep doing this to himself? He knew that it would only end in pain and death.

He wished... someone would take him in and tell him that everything would be fine.

* * *

><p><strong>10. Memories by Within Temptation<strong>

**Fading Memory **

He saw his friends again, smiling, happy, waving at him, beckoning him to join them.

He almost smiled, before the illusion was broken and he was, again, alone.

His memories were the closest he could get to happiness now, alone in this void.

It was almost cruel, the way he could remember things so clearly, but never quite clear enough.

He wanted them back.

He wanted to be happy.

He wanted... he wanted to be wanted again.

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><p><strong>Authors Note.<strong>

**... Number five turned out to not be about loneliness at all... Jeez.**

**Please review!**


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